Find the Program Under Your Trigger
Take one real reaction from your life and trace it backwards.
By the end, you will have mapped what may be running underneath it.
Before you begin:
Choose one reaction you know well.
Over-explaining. Chasing. Shutting down.
Saying yes when you mean no.
Getting defensive. Overthinking.
Keep that one reaction with you through all four videos.
Your Reaction Is the End of the Sequence
First, we are going to stop looking at your behaviour
as though it appeared from nowhere.
Your first job
Think of one recent moment where the reaction happened.
What Did You Make It Mean?
Now we separate what actually happened
from the meaning and prediction that came after it.
Map the middle of the sequence
Find the Rule Underneath It
Now we investigate the rule that may make
your automatic reaction make sense.
Ask one question
What rule would make this response make sense?
Examples:
“Distance must be fixed.”
“If someone misunderstands me, I have to fix it.”
“Other people’s disappointment must be avoided.”
Catch the Program Before It Makes the Next Move
Awareness gives you a chance to see the sequence
before you automatically complete it.
The pause
Map Your Whole Sequence
Now put the reaction you have been investigating
into one complete map.
EVENT
↓
FILTER
↓
PERSONAL MEANING
↓
PREDICTION
↓
BODY RESPONSE
↓
AUTOMATIC MOVE
↓
POSSIBLE RULE
You do not need every answer to be perfect.
You are learning to see the sequence.
The earlier you can see it, the earlier choice becomes available.